Holyyy Crahp

I’ve just read some of the posts from my old blog.

Not the one I’ve linked to in my about page. No – the one before that. The one where I used my real name. The worst thing I have ever written, where I was attention-seeking. Towards the end of it, you can see the person I am now; the foundations of that grew after 13 October 2014.

It’s a shock. It’s a slap in the face. My heart’s racing and I can’t BELIEVE I forgot about this huge section of my life.

I don’t even want to classify it as a blog. Because, really, I NEVER interacted with my readers, I barely ever received comments (and I do mean barely ever) and it didn’t occur to me to get involved with the community. At all.

So, you know, I’m looking back at these old posts and I’m so glad I wrote on the next blog as Gem, and on this blog as Elm. It’s made me grow. But to look back at this is so funny, and so heartbreaking, because it was before EVERYTHING went to hell with Ash. I mean I ended it in November 2014, which were the happiest days of my life.

It’s funny how my writing style’s changed, isn’t it?

As for you guys looking – unfortunately, unless you know my real name, I can’t show it. If you ask me, I’ll give you the link, because I’m annonymous on here, which means no real name on the public blog.

Then again, I could change my name, site address etc etc. If I do, you’ll get to see a part of my life that hardly anyone got to see – or rather, I posted it ALL over Twitter, but it’s something you guys haven’t seen.

I kind of don’t want to do that, to be honest. I want to save something like a relic, from before the fake names made me into the person I am, right now.

If you do want to see it, let me know.

Thanks for reading!

From Elm πŸ™‚

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14 thoughts on “Holyyy Crahp

  1. To be honest I would probably say that if you’re not sure if you want to show it, then maybe it’s not time yet… Don’t rush into anything if you don’t want to, and if you want to just keep it for you, do that thing. πŸ’— xx

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