That Standard “What I’m Going to Do Next Year”

SOOOO GUYS, it’s nearly 2016 and I can’t believe how quickly 2015 has gone! Everyone’s doing new year’s resolutions, and I-

I CANNOT write like that any more. Writing like that’s good and all, and I love posts that start off like that, but it’s not me and that’s what this post is about.

I’m going to do this my own way, by telling you what I’m going to do next year. Hopefully it won’t bore you to tears. I want to show you, well, ME and what I think. So, in my typical lazy as shit fashion, let’s do a list of PARAGRAPHS.

Next year, I’m going to be kinder to myself. I’m going to smile and laugh more, and not get so angry when I do things wrong. I’m going to take pride in what I do, and realise I’m okay when I think I’ve done something good.

I’m going to make as many people as happy as possible. I’m going to show them I’m here, that they don’t have to shut their problems out. I’m going to talk to more people at school, showing them I’m not some idiot who can’t socialise, because I’m not afraid to talk to them. Why should I be?

I’m going to help my friends when they need me. I want them to know that friendship is when you support each other, and I’m going to do that as much as I can.

I’m going to continue to write this blog, because it’s my home. I want to help people, and if I help people through my posts, it’ll make my year. I’ll continue writing as I am, because that’s who I want to show you, not lists or the me that loves books or writes about philosophical things, but ALL of me. You deserve to see it.

And the one thing I’m terrified about?

I’m going to get a conclusion for the Ash situation, for MYSELF. We’ll never be friends again, but by the end of 2016, I’m going to have talked to him again. I don’t care if that’s on good terms, but I won’t leave it like this. Maybe that’s just me wanting something to happen, but I don’t know. I need an end to almost a year, now, of pent up hurt and anger and confusion. It’s what I deserve and I can’t deny it to myself.

I’m going to make mistakes. I’m going to screw up, and cry, and fail and scream and go through as many rough patches as I’ve done this year. A year ago, I did some awful things – even 6 months ago, when I thought I knew what I was capable of in the realm of being horrible. I was immature a year and a half ago, and I’m going to be immature next year, and do some horrendous things that I’ll blog about because I’ll either feel guilty or think I’m right. I’ll have good days and bad days and be the Elm you know, and the Elm I will discover in the next year, because I’m going to change – you all know that. In life, we change, no matter what we go through.

I hope you’ll join me, with your stories and your laughter and your tears, because we’ll help each other through. It’s what we do, right? We can’t go through this alone.

Here’s to a year of happiness and sadness and everything in between, a year where we’re more than we were in the last. Here’s to a year where we make mistakes, but we’re more aware of them; a year where we do stupid things, but instead of brushing them off, we embrace them and learn to smile about it.

Thank you for seeing me through these last 9 months. No matter if you were here from the start or you started following me yesterday, thanks for being a part of my life. It means a lot to me.

OH BY THE WAY, it’s my birthday tomorrow. Scary stuff.

From Elm πŸ™‚

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67 thoughts on “That Standard “What I’m Going to Do Next Year”

  1. Happy early birthday Elm hopefully it won’t be as scary as you think. Unless you’re turning 50 or something because that i have to tell you is old.
    As for the other stuff like is hard but in the end you get through it. I haven’t read your previous posts so i don’t know who Ash is but yes i think it’s better to talk to him then just leave it like that. I had a fight with my friend once where we just completely stopped talking for like half a year and i didn’t want that but i wanted her to admit her mistake and apologize to me because she hurt me. but she never did. but later i realized a bit to late that it was better to be bigger person. I went up to her and apologized for something i did not even know and even though we did not remain best friends after that because she moved away, i felt at peace. I felted like i could finally move on knowing that i hadn’t upset someone. It’s a hard thing to do but believe me once you do it there’s nothing better. Lol i really hope that made sense.

    • Of course it did, and it really helped. Ash and I just left things, not even arguing really, just that we stopped talking and we both know that we hurt each other, but we don’t exactly know how. What happened with your friend has really motivated me to do something again, to open up what happened between hmand me but to heal it rather than make it worse. Thank you so much πŸ™‚
      Also, I’m turning 16.

      • Aw it’s your sweet 16 then. Do something crazy. I’ll turn 19 in June and I already hate it. I feel so old or maybe the complete I just don’t act my age. I’m supposed to be mature and stuff but I’m the complete opposite.

  2. Here’s to a year with many more laughs than tears. You deserve one, girl. And I think you’re right – an end to the Ash situation, and some closure sounds like a good idea to me. Good luck. XX

    • Thank you SO much – yeah, I just need SOMETHING to let myself know I’m over this and to get an end to the hurt I’ve had. I hope you have a fantastic year.

  3. Oh Elm. That was so so SO touching AND beautiful. Like, I literally want to cry and give you a massive hug right now (look at me being all british and saying massive). I HOPE that 2016 is going to be your best year yet, and most importantly I want to see how you will use your new-found wisdom in dealing with everything. I am sure this blog has helped you with a lot, and I can’t wait to find out what’ll happen next! (And quite frankly every single one of us is DYING to get a finale for the Ash situation. It’s like a rare, un-dumb reality TV show. ELM YOU ARE LITERALLY LIKE THE KARDASHIANS RIGHT NOW OMG BUT EVEN BETTER BECAUSE YOU ARE SMART)
    I hope we’ll be spending 2016 sharing our lives and getting to know more about each other through our blogs. Not just us two, but the whole community.
    HAVE A BEAUTIFUL YEAR ❀

  4. Happy early birthday! I’ll wish you a happy birthday tomorrow too πŸ™‚ And those resolutions are really great! Also, I hope you the best for next year! πŸ™‚

  5. Elm, I’m so happy that you’ve taken action into being more positive, happy and confident! You obviously have si many reasons to be proud of yourself! Happy New Year! I’m so happy that I found your blog and thank you for your support ever since I joined the blogosphere!

  6. HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOUUUUU (for tomorrow but let’s just pretend I sent this on the actual date) and they are really good resolutions!! It sounded like you were giving a really emotional toast at the end

  7. Sweet 16, right?! Happy Early Birthday! My sister is also a New Years Eve baby, but she’s turning 11 :). I love your blog, and just realized you are blind! Wow, I don’t really see how I could have not noticed that, and I just realized I wasn’t following you! Following now!

  8. You’ve ALREADY helped people through your blog posts and that’s the most amazing thing you could’ve accomplished this year…to get us through the hardest times in our lives and continue dealing with your own life. It’s been a hard year and thanks for helping me through it! HAPPY NEW YEAR! And happy early birthday πŸ˜‰ xx

  9. I must say, the thing I love about your blog and the reason I’m following it, is that you’re so sincere and raw in your writing. I love a good variety in terms of writing, but I certainly know where to look for sincerity. Kudos, and happy early birthday. πŸ™‚

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