The True Awesomeness ofMy Dad

It’s not often that I actually sit myself down and definitively think about the fact that somebody’s a good person. I KNOW it, but I often don’t ponder it.

I’ve got a lot in common with my dad, most likely because he raised me to think like him and to not be prejudiced and that. I’ve always been able to talk to him much more easily than my mum – he knows where I truly met my boyfriend, Aspen; he’s been really accepting of my other relationships; we often have deep discussions about life, and ethics, and I love it.

Today, I got hit by how accepting he actually is, and how different he is to my mother and, I’m guessing, to a lot of other parents when it comes to this sort of thing. He has NEVER had a problem with Aspen, even chiding me when I ask for his permission for Aspen to come over – because, in his words, I’m 16 and can make my own decisions, so there’s no need to ask him. He let me go to my local theme park to meet what was then an internet friend, helping me and not kicking up a fuss. He’s been MORE than happy to help me because he realises I’m not naive and not a child, and that’s the key difference between my mother and him.

I thought I wouldn’t be able to see Aspen tomorrow, after about 2 weeks of not seeing him – that doesn’t seem like much, but it worried me. I’d discussed previously with dad about him coming over, but then I thought it couldn’t happen because we had to pick my mother up at the airport at 4. Then, he asked me this:

“Elm, what time’s Aspen coming over tomorrow?”

“Huh?!”

“Well, what time’s he coming over?”

“He can’t; we have to pick mum up tomorrow!”

“Um, yes he can; you can ask him if he wants to come over for. lunch and we can drop him off at the station afterwards.”

“Really?”

I was surprised, and I have no idea why. It’s probably because I had already assumed I couldn’t see him, and then for my dad to suggest it – without me saying anything – hit home.

Again, it’s in stark contrast to what my mum would have done. For God’s sake, she has no idea I met him on the internet, and I don’t think I can ever tell her because it’s something she can never understand. That’s terrible, but it’s the truth.

Another example of this is yesterday, I casually mentioned that there was a “Gay club” at lunch and he asked if I went, I said yes, and he said nothing on the matter whereas my mum would have questioned me, then went “Hmmmm,” in that way of hers.

Turns out, parents are people, not oppressive monsters. I guess I’ve started to appreciate that much more recently.

What are your parents, or parent figures, like? Do you trust one more than the other, or do you not trust your parent?

From Elm πŸ™‚

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58 thoughts on “The True Awesomeness ofMy Dad

  1. I’m glad you have someone like your Dad in your life. My mum and dad are very different people and I go to them for different things. My mum is like my best friend and that’s because she fits under all the things you need in a best friend. But she’s also my mum and can sometimes be over protective, I don’t think she would understand blogging. Whilst my Dad is also the one that I talk to about life and values and he’s the one who reads my writing, we’re very similar people, but he’s not great for understanding the little things that stress me out. I’m not sure why I’m telling you this, I think it’s so you don’t feel alone? Sorry this turned into my life story. Have a lovely evening!

  2. Sounds a bit like my family πŸ™‚ Although I generally end up sharing more with my mum, my dad is more understanding of a lot of things, maybe because he’s a mental health health worker πŸ™‚

  3. I’m the opposite in the sense that I have that kind of relationship with my mum (I’m a mummy’s boy) πŸ™‚ and my dad literally questions everything that I do

  4. Ah cute! Love this πŸ™‚ I definitely talk to my mom more…literally all the time. She’s basically my best friend. But my dad is always there when I need him to talk about something serious or give me words of fatherly wisdom πŸ˜‰

      • sameeeeeeeeeeeee, except things make it worse with my parents becausethey are really strict and realigious too, and i am not at all

      • yep, it does, in non uniform days i bunk cos of what my mum forces me to wear(ugly religious clothing),and yeah loads of other things like losing interest in things i have done before.and in my religion, once you come of age, it is your responsiblity, and its not between parents, which they are really disobeying, i think most strict parents just use religion as an excuse to their advantage.bye:)Xxx

      • yeah, but my mum tells my dad, then yeah, things get out of hand for me, its easier when my parents are apart tho, cos my dad isn’t that religios, but he is strict about the rules he follows, so that isn’t too bad on its own, and my mum isn’t strict on what she follows, but she knows a lot more than my dad, so cos they are together its like double dilemma, but next week, my dad is moving to leeds, which is 5 hours away from where i live in london, because he found a high paying job, and he is only back in the weekend, so things might get better!!!!!!thanks for putting up with my ranting:)Xxx

      • Hehe I don’t ‘put up’ with it – I like listening to it cause you’re my friend. Hopefully, things WILL get better πŸ™‚

  5. Yeah same for me, My dad is open-minded about some stuff but my mom really isn’t, but I can tell she means well and doesn’t want me hurt. That’s one of the reasons why I ask my dad for stuff first before my mom πŸ˜‰ because my dad will do the convincing for me. works everytime.

  6. my dad is like yours too . Very easy going , maybe sometimes too much .
    But I was never close to mine because I didn’t grow up with him and I only had my mom to take care of me . I met him 6 years now when I came to the US and I liked him more and more as the years came . He can be extremely embarrassing and sometimes I’m ashamed to be around him but I feel like most children are embarrassed by their parents at some point of their lives . I never appreciate it But I’m beginning to be thankful for him sticking with me throughout the homeless process and always wanting to get involve in my life even with me being so far from him .
    I’m really glad you have your dad in your life and I’m proud you recognize him for who he is and that he is so accepting of your boyfriend and your decisions . I wish you the best ,
    your rebel leader and blogging friend
    Ayele .

    • Oh Ayele, that is so lovely. Your dad sounds like a brilliant guy and I can tell you love him a lot. There aren’t many people who’d stick with others through WHATEVER happens, and I’m glad he’ll do that for you.

  7. Your dad sounds amazing and you two seem to get on pretty well. I’m closer to my mum but my dad and I really don’t go together for some reason. anyways, I’m glad you have a good relationship with your dad.

  8. I kind of tell my mum more than my dad, or talk to mum more than dad I mean (when I’m at my mums), but I think that’s just because she’s a girl/woman.
    Although if I had a choice as to who i’d want to live with, I’d still choose dad. He’s brought us up, he’s the one who’s lived with us our whole lives. I’m not exactly prepared to leave that. I still tell dad a LOT, but I just don’t feel comfortable with talking to him about SOME stuff (if you know what I mean).

    • Course I do – I guess I’m the same, and it’s the same about living with my dad. I often get shuttled between houses like a package, but that’s mostly my mum’s doing – I grew up with my dad, like you.

      • Yeah:) My mum was only 19 when she had me, she was a good mum but she was just kind of effed in the head from stuff that happened to her when she was young, so yeah. She moved out when I was nearly two and my dad’s had us since then. No idea what my point is exactly but yeahπŸ˜‚

      • No, it’s a good point. I’m sorry about what happened to your mum, but it can’t be helped; your dad did a good job of raising you.

      • Nah it’s okay, we see her a lot more often now and she’s a lot more stable, and yeah:) I’m getting good grades now, not being stupid in class, etc ahaha so basically I’m just a lot happier/better now too:P

  9. Wow, your dad is amazing. If only he got you deserts tho.
    Seriously, you really are one lucky girl. My dad is SO not like that with my sister, he’s way too overprotective (you know, in a loving way). I don’t really have a very deep relationship with my parents but we do get along and banter and kid and all that. I used to not really be close with my dad because he used to work all the time, and now he still works but we’ve grown closer. And like mom is mom, she’s been there all my life. I can’t imagine anything happening to her, oh god no. That turned dramatic!

  10. Wow your dad sounds so amazing! I never even knee parents could be that understanding. Mine are in ALLLLLL my bloody business which is why today I decided to leave my blog and make it not anonymous and start a new anonymous one and this time I will not tell then about it. So this blog is going to have a complete change over. You’re so lucky your dad is so understanding your description of your mom sounds a lot like mine and my dad gets me but not as much as your dad seems too!

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